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96
The Inventions of the Idiot
·
John Kendrick Bangs
10
"That's
a
confession,"
retorted
the
Idiot.
"Do
you
find
out
these
mistakes
in
your
practice
before
or
after
the
death
of
the
patient?"
"That
mistake,"
continued
the
Doctor,
paying
apparently
little
heed
to
the
Idiot's
remark--"that
mistake
lies
in
the
Idiot's
assumption
that
he
is
himself
the
world.
He
regards
himself
as
the
earth,
as
all
of
life,
and,
because
he
happens
to
be
weary,
the
world
is
a
weary
one."
"It
isn't
a
fatal
disease,
is
it?"
queried
the
Idiot,
anxiously.
"I
am
not
likely
to
become
so
impressed
with
that
idea,
for
instance,
that
I
shall
have
to
be
put
in
a
padded
cell
and
manacled
so
that
I
may
not
turn
perpetual
handsprings
under
the
hallucination
that,
being
the
world,
it
is
my
duty
to
revolve?"
"No,"
replied
the
Doctor,
with
a
laugh.
"No,
indeed.
That
is
not
at
all
likely
to
happen,
but
I
think
it
would
be
a
good
idea
if
you
were
to
carry
the
hallucination
out
far
enough
to
put
a
cake
of
ice
on
your
head,
assuming
that
to
be
the
north
pole,
and
cool
off
that
brain
of
yours."
"That
is
a
good
idea,"
returned
the
Idiot;
"and
if
Mary
will
bring
me
the
ice
that
was
used
to
cool
the
coffee
this
morning,
I
shall
be
pleased
to
try
the
experiment.
Meanwhile,
this
is
a
weary
world."
"Then
why
under
the
canopy
don't
you
leave
it
and
go
to
some
other
world?"
snapped
Mr.
Pedagog.
"You
are
under
no
obligation
to
remain
here.
With
a
river
on
either
side
of
the
city,
and
a
New
York
Juggernaut
Company,
Unlimited,
running
trolley-cars
up
and
down
two
of
our
more
prominent
highways,
suicide
is
within
the
reach
of
all.
Of
course,
we
should
be
sorry
to
lose
you,
in
a
way,
but
I
have
known
men
to
recover
from
even
greater
afflictions
than
that."
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