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349
The Journal of a Disappointed Man
·
W. N. P. Barbellion
109
K----
comes
in
from
her
dancing
class,
nods
to
me,
hugs
her
sister
around
the
neck
and
says,--
"Oh!
you
dear
thing,
you've
got
a
cold."
"I
shouldn't
do
that,"
I
remark,
green-eyed,
"she's
in
an
awful
wax
to-night."
She:
"Oh!
I
don't
mind
K----!"
(Laughter!)
October
8.
Heard
a
knock
at
the
door
last
night,
and,
thinking
it
was
R----,
I
unbolted
it
and
let
in
a
tramp
who
at
once
asked
God
to
bless
me
and
crown
all
my
sorrow
with
joy.
An
amiable
fellow
to
be
sure--so
I
gave
him
some
coppers
and
he
at
once
repeated
with
wonderful
fervour,
"God
bless
you,
sir."
"I
wish
He
would,"
I
answered,
"I
have
a
horrible
cold."
"Ah,
I
know,
I
gets
it
myself
and
the
hinfluenza--have
you
had
that,
sir?"
In
ten
minutes
I
should
have
told
him
all
my
personal
history.
But
he
was
thirsting
for
a
drink
and
went
off
quickly
and
left
me
with
my
heart
unburthened.
London
is
a
lonely
place.
To-day
journeyed
to
----
where
I
gave
evidence
as
an
expert
in
Economic
Entomology
at
the
County
Court
in
a
case
concerning
damage
to
furniture
by
mites
for
which
I
am
paid
£8
8s.
fee
and
expenses
and
travelled
first
class.
What
irony!
(See
June
30,
1911.)
October
11.
I
may
be
a
weak,
maundering,
vacillating
fool
but
I
cannot
help
loving
her
on
one
day,
being
indifferent
the
next
and
on
some
occasions
even
disliking
her....
To-day
she
was
charming,
with
a
certain
warm
glossy
perfection
on
her
face
and
hair....
And
she
loves
me--I
could
swear
it.
"And
when
a
woman
woos
..."
etc.
How
difficult
for
a
vain
and
lonely
man
to
resist
her.
She
tells
me
many
times
in
many
dainty
ways
that
she
loves
me
without
so
much
as
stopping
her
work
to
talk.
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