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150
Literary Lapses
·
Stephen Leacock
125
"Nor
is
Lake
Owatawetness
merely
an
Angler's
Paradise.
Vast
forests
of
primeval
pine
slope
to
the
very
shores
of
the
lake,
to
which
descend
great
droves
of
bears--brown,
green,
and
bear-coloured--while
as
the
shades
of
evening
fall,
the
air
is
loud
with
the
lowing
of
moose,
cariboo,
antelope,
cantelope,
musk-oxes,
musk-rats,
and
other
graminivorous
mammalia
of
the
forest.
These
enormous
quadrumana
generally
move
off
about
10.30
p.m.,
from
which
hour
until
11.45
p.m.
the
whole
shore
is
reserved
for
bison
and
buffalo.
"After
midnight
hunters
who
so
desire
it
can
be
chased
through
the
woods,
for
any
distance
and
at
any
speed
they
select,
by
jaguars,
panthers,
cougars,
tigers,
and
jackals
whose
ferocity
is
reputed
to
be
such
that
they
will
tear
the
breeches
off
a
man
with
their
teeth
in
their
eagerness
to
sink
their
fangs
in
his
palpitating
flesh.
Hunters,
attention!
Do
not
miss
such
attractions
as
these!"
I
have
seen
men--quiet,
reputable,
well-shaved
men--reading
that
pamphlet
of
mine
in
the
rotundas
of
hotels,
with
their
eyes
blazing
with
excitement.
I
think
it
is
the
jaguar
attraction
that
hits
them
the
hardest,
because
I
notice
them
rub
themselves
sympathetically
with
their
hands
while
they
read.
Of
course,
you
can
imagine
the
effect
of
this
sort
of
literature
on
the
brains
of
men
fresh
from
their
offices,
and
dressed
out
as
pirates.
They
just
go
crazy
and
stay
crazy.
Just
watch
them
when
they
get
into
the
bush.
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