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1036
Enquire within upon everything
·
Robert Kemp Philp
152
191.
Hints
to
"Cockney
Speakers."
The
most
objectionable
error
of
the
Cockney,
that
of
substituting
the
v
for
the
w,
and
vice
versâ,
is,
we
believe,
pretty
generally
abandoned.
Such
sentences
as
"Are
you
going
to
Vest
Vickkam?"
"This
is
wery
good
weal,"
&c.,
were
too
intolerable
to
be
retained.
Moreover,
there
has
been
a
very
able
schoolmaster
at
work
during
the
past
forty
years.
This
schoolmaster
is
no
other
than
the
loquacious
Mr.
Punch,
from
whose
works
we
quote
a
few
admirable
exercises:
i.
Low
Cockney.--"Seen
that
party
lately?"
"What!
the
party
with
the
wooden
leg,
as
come
with--"
"No,
no--not
that
party.
The
party,
you
know,
as--"
"Oh!
ah!
I
know
the
party
you
mean,
now."
"Well,
a
party
told
me
as
he
can't
agree
with
that
other
party,
and
he
says
that
if
another
party
can't
be
found
to
make
it
all
square,
he
shall
look
out
for
a
party
as
will."--(And
so
on
for
half
an
hour.)
ii.
Police.--"Lor,
Soosan,
how's
a
feller
to
eat
meat
such
weather
as
this!
Now,
a
bit
o'
pickled
salmon
and
cowcumber,
or
a
lobster
salid,
might
do."
iii.
Cockney
Yachtsman.--(Example
of
affectation.)
Scene:
the
Regatta
Ball.--"I
say,
Tom,
what's
that
little
craft
with
the
black
velvet
flying
at
the
fore,
close
under
the
lee
scuppers
of
the
man-of-war?"
"Why,
from
her
fore-and-aft
rig,
and
the
cut
of
her
mainsail,
I
should
say
she's
down
from
the
port
of
London;
but
I'll
signal
the
commodore
to
come
and
introduce
us!"
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