Lab
Library
Journal
Shop
Sign in
to keep
Share image
1
264
Right Ho, Jeeves
·
P. G. Wodehouse
159
“No,
no.”
“Then
what
do
you
mean
you’ve
got
good
news?”
I
endeavoured
to
soothe.
“You
mustn’t
take
it
so
hard,
Gussie.
Why
worry
about
a
laughably
simple
job
like
distributing
prizes
at
a
school?”
“Laughably
simple,
eh?
Do
you
realize
I’ve
been
sweating
for
days
and
haven’t
been
able
to
think
of
a
thing
to
say
yet,
except
that
I
won’t
detain
them
long.
You
bet
I
won’t
detain
them
long.
I’ve
been
timing
my
speech,
and
it
lasts
five
seconds.
What
the
devil
am
I
to
say,
Bertie?
What
do
you
say
when
you’re
distributing
prizes?”
I
considered.
Once,
at
my
private
school,
I
had
won
a
prize
for
Scripture
knowledge,
so
I
suppose
I
ought
to
have
been
full
of
inside
stuff.
But
memory
eluded
me.
Then
something
emerged
from
the
mists.
“You
say
the
race
is
not
always
to
the
swift.”
“Why?”
“Well,
it’s
a
good
gag.
It
generally
gets
a
hand.”
“I
mean,
why
isn’t
it?
Why
isn’t
the
race
to
the
swift?”
“Ah,
there
you
have
me.
But
the
nibs
say
it
isn’t.”
“But
what
does
it
mean?”
“I
take
it
it’s
supposed
to
console
the
chaps
who
haven’t
won
prizes.”
“What’s
the
good
of
that
to
me?
I’m
not
worrying
about
them.
It’s
the
ones
that
have
won
prizes
that
I’m
worrying
about,
the
little
blighters
who
will
come
up
on
the
platform.
Suppose
they
make
faces
at
me.”
“They
won’t.”
“How
do
you
know
they
won’t?
It’s
probably
the
first
thing
they’ll
think
of.
And
even
if
they
don’t--Bertie,
shall
I
tell
you
something?”
Marker
Marker
Fine marker
White-out
Fine white-out
Circle
Paint
Unmarker
Hand
Scalpel
Dice
Sieve
Purify
Undo
Redo
Start over
