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309
The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness
·
Florence Hartley
227
"I
now
come
to
speak
of
moral
character.
Hard
is
the
contest
between
affection
and
expediency,
when
it
is
raised
by
the
question
of
circumstances.
But
harder
still
is
it,
when
its
result
is
to
be
decided
upon
an
inquiry
into
moral
conduct.
I
know
not
a
more
cruel
situation
than
that
when
the
heart
is
bestowed
on
one
whom
the
judgment
could
not
approve.
I
know
not
one
which
should
be
more
strictly
guarded
against,
not
only
by
parents
and
friends,
but
(for
I
would
impress
on
every
young
lady
how
much
she
may
prove
the
best
guardian
of
her
own
happiness)
by
the
female
heart
itself.
"With
every
vigilance,
with
little
to
blame,
little
to
repent,
such
cases
will
occur
in
this
world.
The
feelings
are
interested,
but
the
judgment
distrusts.
Happy
is
it
for
those
who
know
the
combat
between
affection
and
principle
only
in
single
life,
and
have
not
the
misery
of
encountering
so
severe
a
destiny
when
it
can
no
longer
be
remedied--who
know
not
how
to
fulfill
the
vow
to
honor
what
is
proved
to
be
unworthy--and
yet
still
must
love,--for
the
affections
once
given,
are
little
in
our
own
power.
"In
such
a
case
occurring
to
the
young,
in,
perhaps,
a
first
attachment,
I
think
they
must
be
guided
by
friends.
I
am
not
an
advocate
for
the
interference
of
friends:
where
it
is
much
a
question
of
a
long
and
contingent
engagement--a
question
of
being
married
at
once,
or
of
waiting,
in
some
uncertainty--a
question
of
ease
or
discomfort,
of
limited
means
or
luxury--in
such
instances,
if
the
moral
character
be
unexceptionable,
it
is
the
duty
of
parents
to
point
out
all
the
risk,
all
the
disadvantages,
but
to
leave
the
heart
to
form
its
own
decisions.
Let
them
not
seek
to
wrench
the
affections
from
the
channel
in
which
they
flowed,
when
fresh
from
their
source.
They
cannot
know
how
deep
the
channel
is--they
cannot
know
if
ever
those
pure
and
beautiful
waters
will
flow
in
peace
again
when
once
hastily
turned
aside.
But
in
cases
of
moral
character,
of
right
or
wrong,
the
affair
is
wholly
different,
and
the
strictest
parental
authority
ought,
upon
due
inquiry,
to
be
exercised.
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