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349
The Journal of a Disappointed Man
·
W. N. P. Barbellion
330
So
I
had
to
continue
my
struggle
against
odds,
and
only
within
the
last
year
or
so
began
to
squeeze
the
authorities
with
any
success.
In
time
I
should
have
revolutionised
the
study
of
Systematic
Zoology,
and
the
anonymous
paper
I
wrote
in
conjunction
with
R----
in
the
American
Naturalist
was
a
rare
jeu
d'esprit,
and
my
most
important
scientific
work.
In
the
literary
world
I
have
fared
no
better.
My
first
published
article
appeared
at
the
age
of
15
over
my
father's
name,
my
motive
being
not
so
much
modesty
as
cunning--if
the
literary
world
(!)
ragged
it
unmercifully,
there
was
still
a
chance
left
for
me
to
make
good.
My
next
achievement
of
any
magnitude
was
the
unexpected
printing
of
a
story
in
the
Academy
after
I
had
unsuccessfully
badgered
almost
every
other
newspaper.
This
was
when
I
was
19.
No
proof
had
been
sent
me
and
no
intimation
of
its
acceptance.
Moreover,
there
were
two
ugly
printer's
errors.
I
at
once
wrote
off
to
correct
them
in
the
next
issue.
My
letter
was
neither
published
nor
acknowledged.
I
submitted,
but
presently
wrote
again,
politely
hinting
that
my
cheque
was
overdue.
But--screams
of
silence,
and
I
thought
it
wise
not
to
complain
in
view
of
future
printing
favours.
I
soon
discovered
that
the
journal
had
changed
hands
and
was
probably
on
its
last
legs
at
the
time
of
my
success.
As
soon
as
it
grew
financially
sound
again
no
more
of
my
stories
were
accepted.
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