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235
The Private Papers of Henry Ryecroft
·
George Gissing
51
Scholarship
in
the
high
sense
was
denied
me,
and
now
it
is
too
late.
Yet
here
am
I
gloating
over
Pausanias,
and
promising
myself
to
read
every
word
of
him.
Who
that
has
any
tincture
of
old
letters
would
not
like
to
read
Pausanias,
instead
of
mere
quotations
from
him
and
references
to
him?
Here
are
the
volumes
of
Dahn's
Die
Konige
der
Germanen:
who
would
not
like
to
know
all
he
can
about
the
Teutonic
conquerors
of
Rome?
And
so
on,
and
so
on.
To
the
end
I
shall
be
reading--and
forgetting.
Ah,
that's
the
worst
of
it!
Had
I
at
command
all
the
knowledge
I
have
at
any
time
possessed,
I
might
call
myself
a
learned
man.
Nothing
surely
is
so
bad
for
the
memory
as
long-enduring
worry,
agitation,
fear.
I
cannot
preserve
more
than
a
few
fragments
of
what
I
read,
yet
read
I
shall,
persistently,
rejoicingly.
Would
I
gather
erudition
for
a
future
life?
Indeed,
it
no
longer
troubles
me
that
I
forget.
I
have
the
happiness
of
the
passing
moment,
and
what
more
can
mortal
ask?
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