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The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness
·
Florence Hartley
56
CHAPTER
VIII.
VISITING.
ETIQUETTE
FOR
THE
GUEST.
As
a
first
rule
with
regard
to
paying
a
visit,
the
best
one
is,
never
to
accept
a
general
invitation.
Instances
are
very
common
where
women
(I
cannot
say
ladies)
have,
upon
a
slight
acquaintance,
and
a
"When
you
are
in
C----
I
should
be
very
happy
to
have
you
visit
me,"
actually
gone
to
C----
from
their
own
home,
and,
with
bag
and
baggage,
quartered
themselves
upon
the
hospitality
of
their
newly
made
friend,
for
weeks
at
a
time.
Even
where
there
is
a
long
standing
friendship
it
is
not
well
to
visit
uninvited.
It
is
impossible
for
you,
in
another
city,
to
know
exactly
when
it
will
be
convenient
for
your
friend
to
have
you
visit
her,
unless
she
tells
you,
and
that
will,
of
course,
be
a
special
invitation.
If
your
friends
are
really
desirous
to
have
you
pay
them
a
visit,
they
will
name
a
time
when
it
will
be
convenient
and
agreeable
to
have
you
come,
and
you
may
accept
the
invitation
with
the
certainty
that
you
will
not
incommode
them.
Self-proposed
visits
are
still
worse.
You,
in
a
manner,
force
an
invitation
from
your
friend
when
you
tell
her
that
you
can
come
at
a
certain
time,
unless
you
have
previously
arranged
to
let
her
know
when
you
can
be
her
guest.
In
that
case,
your
own
time
is
understood
to
be
the
most
agreeable
for
her.
If,
whilst
traveling,
you
pass
through
a
town
where
you
have
friends
whom
you
wish
to
visit,
and
who
would
be
hurt
if
you
omitted
to
do
so,
go
first
to
a
hotel,
and
either
call
or
send
word
that
you
are
there.
Then,
it
is
optional
with
them
to
extend
their
hospitality
or
not.
Do
not
be
offended
if
it
is
not
done.
The
love
for
you
may
be
undiminished,
and
the
desire
to
entertain
you
very
great,
yet
family
reasons
may
render
such
an
invitation
as
you
expect,
impossible.
Your
friend
may
have
engagements
or
duties
at
the
time,
that
would
prevent
her
making
the
visit
pleasant
for
you,
and
wish
to
postpone
the
invitation
until
she
can
entertain
you
as
she
wishes.
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