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309
The Ladies' Book of Etiquette, and Manual of Politeness
·
Florence Hartley
72
In
paying
your
visits
of
condolence,
show,
by
your
own
quiet
gravity,
that
you
sympathize
in
the
recent
affliction
of
your
friend.
Though
you
may
endeavor
to
comfort
and
cheer
her,
you
must
avoid
a
gay
or
careless
air,
as
it
will
be
an
insult
at
such
a
time.
Avoid
any
allusion
to
the
past
that
may
be
trying
for
her
to
hear
or
answer,
yet
do
not
ignore
the
subject
entirely,
as
that
appears
like
a
want
of
interest
in
it.
Though
you
may
feel
happy,
avoid
parading
your
own
joyousness
at
such
a
time;
whatever
your
own
feeling
may
be,
respect
the
sorrow
of
another.
Never
sit
gazing
curiously
around
the
room
when
paying
a
call,
as
if
taking
a
mental
inventory
of
the
furniture.
It
is
excessively
rude.
It
is
still
worse
to
appear
to
notice
any
disorder
or
irregularity
that
may
occur.
If,
while
paying
a
call,
you
perceive
that
any
unforeseen
matter
in
the
family,
calls
for
the
attention
of
the
lady
of
the
house,
leave
instantly,
no
matter
how
short
your
call
has
been.
Your
friend
may
not
appear
to
notice
the
screams
of
a
child,
a
noise
in
the
kitchen,
or
the
cry
from
the
nursery
that
the
fire
board
has
caught
fire,
but
you
may
be
sure
she
does
hear
it,
and
though
too
well-bred
to
speak
of
it,
will
heartily
rejoice
to
say
good-bye.
Do
not
take
a
child
with
you
to
pay
calls,
until
it
is
old
enough
to
behave
quietly
and
with
propriety.
To
have
a
troublesome
child
constantly
touching
the
parlor
ornaments,
balancing
itself
on
the
back
of
a
chair,
leaning
from
a
window,
or
performing
any
of
the
thousand
tricks
in
which
children
excel,
is
an
annoyance,
both
to
yourself
and
your
hostess.
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