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1
150
Literary Lapses
·
Stephen Leacock
75
I.--REMAINS
OF
ASTRONOMY
Astronomy
teaches
the
correct
use
of
the
sun
and
the
planets.
These
may
be
put
on
a
frame
of
little
sticks
and
turned
round.
This
causes
the
tides.
Those
at
the
ends
of
the
sticks
are
enormously
far
away.
From
time
to
time
a
diligent
searching
of
the
sticks
reveals
new
planets.
The
orbit
of
a
planet
is
the
distance
the
stick
goes
round
in
going
round.
Astronomy
is
intensely
interesting;
it
should
be
done
at
night,
in
a
high
tower
in
Spitzbergen.
This
is
to
avoid
the
astronomy
being
interrupted.
A
really
good
astronomer
can
tell
when
a
comet
is
coming
too
near
him
by
the
warning
buzz
of
the
revolving
sticks.
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