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Literary Lapses
·
Stephen Leacock
86
But
I
doubt
if
he
ever
got
there.
He
was
too
like
us.
On
Collecting
Things
Like
most
other
men
I
have
from
time
to
time
been
stricken
with
a
desire
to
make
collections
of
things.
It
began
with
postage
stamps.
I
had
a
letter
from
a
friend
of
mine
who
had
gone
out
to
South
Africa.
The
letter
had
a
three-cornered
stamp
on
it,
and
I
thought
as
soon
as
I
looked
at
it,
"That's
the
thing!
Stamp
collecting!
I'll
devote
my
life
to
it."
I
bought
an
album
with
accommodation
for
the
stamps
of
all
nations,
and
began
collecting
right
off.
For
three
days
the
collection
made
wonderful
progress.
It
contained:
One
Cape
of
Good
Hope
stamp.
One
one-cent
stamp,
United
States
of
America.
One
two-cent
stamp,
United
States
of
America.
One
five-cent
stamp,
United
States
of
America.
One
ten-cent
stamp,
United
States
of
America.
After
that
the
collection
came
to
a
dead
stop.
For
a
while
I
used
to
talk
about
it
rather
airily
and
say
I
had
one
or
two
rather
valuable
South
African
stamps.
But
I
presently
grew
tired
even
of
lying
about
it.
Collecting
coins
is
a
thing
that
I
attempt
at
intervals.
Every
time
I
am
given
an
old
half-penny
or
a
Mexican
quarter,
I
get
an
idea
that
if
a
fellow
made
a
point
of
holding
on
to
rarities
of
that
sort,
he'd
soon
have
quite
a
valuable
collection.
The
first
time
that
I
tried
it
I
was
full
of
enthusiasm,
and
before
long
my
collection
numbered
quite
a
few
articles
of
vertu.
The
items
were
as
follows:
Marker
Marker
Fine marker
White-out
Fine white-out
Circle
Paint
Unmarker
Hand
Scalpel
Dice
Sieve
Purify
Undo
Redo
Start over
