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158
Adventures in Contentment
·
David Grayson
88
"You
see
what
it
has
left
me,"
he
said,
"I
am
an
example
of
too
much
life."
In
response
to
Harriet's
melting
compassion
he
had
spoken
with
unfathomable
bitterness.
Suddenly
he
leaned
forward
toward
me
with
a
piercing
gaze
as
though
he
would
look
into
my
soul.
His
face
had
changed
completely;
from
the
loose
and
vacant
mask
of
the
early
evening
it
had
taken
on
the
utmost
tensity
of
emotion.
"You
do
not
know,"
he
said,
"what
it
is
to
live
too
much--and
to
be
afraid."
"Live
too
much?"
I
asked.
"Yes,
live
too
much,
that
is
what
I
do--and
I
am
afraid."
He
paused
a
moment
and
then
broke
out
in
a
higher
key:
"You
think
I
am
a
tramp.
Yes--you
do.
I
know--a
worthless
fellow,
lying,
begging,
stealing
when
he
can't
beg.
You
have
taken
me
in
and
fed
me.
You
have
said
the
first
kind
words
I
have
heard,
it
seems
to
me,
in
years.
I
don't
know
who
you
are.
I
shall
never
see
you
again."
I
cannot
well
describe
the
intensity
of
the
passion
with
which
he
spoke,
his
face
shaking
with
emotion,
his
hands
trembling.
"Oh,
yes,"
I
said
easily,
"we
are
comfortable
people
here--and
it
is
a
good
place
to
live."
"No
no,"
he
returned.
"I
know,
I've
got
my
call--"
Then
leaning
forward
he
said
in
a
lower,
even
more
intense
voice--"I
live
everything
beforehand."
I
was
startled
by
the
look
of
his
eyes:
the
abject
terror
of
it:
and
I
thought
to
myself,
"The
man
is
not
right
in
his
mind."
And
yet
I
longed
to
know
of
the
life
within
this
strange
husk
of
manhood.
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