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150
Literary Lapses
·
Stephen Leacock
89
Society
Chit-Chat
AS
IT
SHOULD
BE
WRITTEN
I
notice
that
it
is
customary
for
the
daily
papers
to
publish
a
column
or
so
of
society
gossip.
They
generally
head
it
"Chit-Chat,"
or
"On
Dit,"
or
"Le
Boudoir,"
or
something
of
the
sort,
and
they
keep
it
pretty
full
of
French
terms
to
give
it
the
proper
sort
of
swing.
These
columns
may
be
very
interesting
in
their
way,
but
it
always
seems
to
me
that
they
don't
get
hold
of
quite
the
right
things
to
tell
us
about.
They
are
very
fond,
for
instance,
of
giving
an
account
of
the
delightful
dance
at
Mrs.
De
Smythe's--at
which
Mrs.
De
Smythe
looked
charming
in
a
gown
of
old
tulle
with
a
stomacher
of
passementerie--or
of
the
dinner-party
at
Mr.
Alonzo
Robinson's
residence,
or
the
smart
pink
tea
given
by
Miss
Carlotta
Jones.
No,
that's
all
right,
but
it's
not
the
kind
of
thing
we
want
to
get
at;
those
are
not
the
events
which
happen
in
our
neighbours'
houses
that
we
really
want
to
hear
about.
It
is
the
quiet
little
family
scenes,
the
little
traits
of
home-life
that--well,
for
example,
take
the
case
of
that
delightful
party
at
the
De
Smythes.
I
am
certain
that
all
those
who
were
present
would
much
prefer
a
little
paragraph
like
the
following,
which
would
give
them
some
idea
of
the
home-life
of
the
De
Smythes
on
the
morning
after
the
party.
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