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Literary Lapses
·
Stephen Leacock
91
DINER
DE
FAMEEL
AT
THE
BOARDING-HOUSE
DE
MCFIGGIN
Yesterday
evening
at
half
after
six
a
pleasant
little
diner
was
given
by
Madame
McFiggin
of
Rock
Street,
to
her
boarders.
The
salle
à
manger
was
very
prettily
decorated
with
texts,
and
the
furniture
upholstered
with
cheveux
de
horse,
Louis
Quinze.
The
boarders
were
all
very
quietly
dressed:
Mrs.
McFiggin
was
daintily
attired
in
some
old
clinging
stuff
with
a
corsage
de
Whalebone
underneath.
The
ample
board
groaned
under
the
bill
of
fare.
The
boarders
groaned
also.
Their
groaning
was
very
noticeable.
The
pièce
de
resistance
was
a
hunko
de
bœuf
boilé,
flanked
with
some
old
clinging
stuff.
The
entrées
were
pâté
de
pumpkin,
followed
by
fromage
McFiggin,
served
under
glass.
Towards
the
end
of
the
first
course,
speeches
became
the
order
of
the
day.
Mrs.
McFiggin
was
the
first
speaker.
In
commencing,
she
expressed
her
surprise
that
so
few
of
the
gentlemen
seemed
to
care
for
the
hunko
de
bœuf;
her
own
mind,
she
said,
had
hesitated
between
hunko
de
bœuf
boilé
and
a
pair
of
roast
chickens
(sensation).
She
had
finally
decided
in
favour
of
the
hunko
de
bœuf
(no
sensation).
She
referred
at
some
length
to
the
late
Mr.
McFiggin,
who
had
always
shown
a
marked
preference
for
hunko
de
bœuf.
Several
other
speakers
followed.
All
spoke
forcibly
and
to
the
point.
The
last
to
speak
was
the
Reverend
Mr.
Whiner.
The
reverend
gentleman,
in
rising,
said
that
he
confided
himself
and
his
fellow-boarders
to
the
special
interference
of
providence.
For
what
they
had
eaten,
he
said,
he
hoped
that
Providence
would
make
them
truly
thankful.
At
the
close
of
the
Repas
several
of
the
boarders
expressed
their
intention
of
going
down
the
street
to
a
restourong
to
get
quelque
chose
à
manger.
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