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Literary Lapses
·
Stephen Leacock
99
Question.
You
evidently
guess
that
a
love
affair
will
ensue
between
the
boy
lieutenant
and
the
peerless
girl
with
the
broad
feet.
Do
you
imagine,
however,
that
its
course
will
run
smoothly
and
leave
nothing
to
record?
Answer.
Not
at
all.
I
feel
certain
that
the
scene
of
the
novel
having
edged
itself
around
to
London,
the
writer
will
not
feel
satisfied
unless
he
introduces
the
following
famous
scene:
"Stunned
by
the
cruel
revelation
which
he
had
received,
unconscious
of
whither
his
steps
were
taking
him,
Gaspard
de
Vaux
wandered
on
in
the
darkness
from
street
to
street
until
he
found
himself
upon
London
Bridge.
He
leaned
over
the
parapet
and
looked
down
upon
the
whirling
stream
below.
There
was
something
in
the
still,
swift
rush
of
it
that
seemed
to
beckon,
to
allure
him.
After
all,
why
not?
What
was
life
now
that
he
should
prize
it?
For
a
moment
De
Vaux
paused
irresolute."
Question.
Will
he
throw
himself
in?
Answer.
Well,
say
you
don't
know
Gaspard.
He
will
pause
irresolute
up
to
the
limit,
then,
with
a
fierce
struggle,
will
recall
his
courage
and
hasten
from
the
Bridge.
Question.
This
struggle
not
to
throw
oneself
in
must
be
dreadfully
difficult?
Answer.
Oh!
dreadfully!
Most
of
us
are
so
frail
we
should
jump
in
at
once.
But
Gaspard
has
the
knack
of
it.
Besides
he
still
has
some
of
the
Sheik's
herb;
he
chews
it.
Question.
What
has
happened
to
De
Vaux
anyway?
Is
it
anything
he
has
eaten?
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